Our parish confirmed teens this month. In our area, confirmation takes place in 10th grade. Usually we have a bishop in to do the confirmations, doing the entire class in a single night. This year, the pandemic dictated that it be subbed out to our pastor (pastors also confirm adult candidates on Easter Vigil), and he did them over a series of four services in order to provide proper social distancing. I assisted at a couple of them, including the final one this past Saturday.
The tradition continues for the confirmandi (i.e. the kids getting confirmed) to pick a saint's name as a confirmation name. On Saturday, it interested me that, of the 25 or so teens who were confirmed that day, at least four of the young men chose St. Sebastian and at least three young women chose St. Cecilia. Afterward, I asked our pastor how it was that ancient martyrs had such followings. He told me that St. Sebastian is considered a patron saint of athletes, and so popular with a lot of teen boys. He wasn't completely sure about St. Cecilia. She is the patron saint of musicians, so maybe some of these girls are musicians (although if they are, I don't think they were involved in the parish music ministry). Or maybe there is something else about Cecilia's legends that appeal to young women?
There also were at least two who chose Rose of Lima. I am not certain why that happened, either - except that she is a patroness of the Philippines, and there are quite a few Filipino families in our areas.
I was confirmed in 4th grade. I remember being afraid that, when the bishop slapped us, it would hurt. Nobody gets slapped in our confirmations these days. I chose St. Mark as my confirmation saint. There was no good reason; I just liked the name. We didn't have to research or write papers about it. I think our teachers assumed we all were steeped in saints and angels, because they were when they were our age; but I went to Catholic school in the post-Vatican II area when a lot of that traditional spirituality was sort of being stripped out. I am a product of the "banners and butterflies" area.
Who is your confirmation saint, and why did you choose her/him?
My confirmation name is Francis. My baptismal name is John the same as my father and grandfather. My middle name is Joseph, the same as my grandfather. However my father's middle name was Francis. So we just continued the tradition of using family names.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was in high school I began to think about who was my patron, I decided it was John the Evangelist rather than John the Baptist. In the readings from the Office for Matins of the Feast of John of the Evangelist (Dec 27) Augustine saw him as an exemplar of the contemplative life and Peter as an exemplar of the active life. Having just read Merton's Seeds of Contemplation I decided I was a contemplative.
Joseph never had much significance for me until about middle age. Then I read of a feminist who divided men into two categories: lovers, who make life exciting but fail to be there when you need them, and husbands who are dull but are there when you need them. I decided I was a Joseph like husband. I am not outgoing and I never flatter people but I am very caring, loyal and reliable. A lot of my success as a mental health administrator was because people trusted me that I didn't have favorites or people whom I disliked.
Francis had no significance to me until Pope Francis. I identify with him very much because we were Jesuit novices at about the same time. A lot of things that people think are original about Francis are just things that he probably learned in novitiate just as I did, e.g. to always give others the benefit of the doubt, to always assume permission when rules get in the way, and to "go in their door so that they will come out your door."
Jack - I was named James; my father always made a point of telling me when I was a kid that I was named for James the Lesser rather than James the Greater. My father could be a leg-puller, but I think he was quite serious about that; I think, for some reason, he had glommed onto James the Lesser.
DeleteThat feminist theory about lovers and husbands you mentioned had become popularized by the time I was a young adult: there were women who dated Boyfriends (exciting, sexy, driving a hot car, with lots of money), and women who dated Husbands (reliable but maybe a little dull). My wife tells me that I am a Husband, which sounds about right. I drive low-maintenance Japanese economy vehicles; I guess, when it comes to cars, I prefer Husbands, too.
Jim, our older son is named James too. Now he is Jim, he used to be Jamie when he wss little. My parents always called him his formal name, James. He told me his patron was James the Greater. Okay then. I told him it referred to height. Sometimes on the feast day of that apostle I text him the video of them swinging that huge botafumeiro at Santiago de Compostella.
DeleteEvery woman knows about the lover/husband categories, and it's been around a lot longer than modern feminism.
DeleteNo woman whose husband finds out about these categories tells him anything but, "Honey, you fit the best of BOTH categories, and that's why I married you!"
I wasn't steeped in saints and angels in my day, either. I think the Sisters chose most of the names. Ours was pushing Anthony, and three of had him as confirmation name. I probably could have named six other saints in 4h grade -- maybe eight if you told me the Apostles were saints while I was trying to think of some.
ReplyDeleteMsgr. James Vlaum has a great story about picking Paul as his confirmation name, which pleased his teacher until he said it was because Paul was his favorite Beatle. Sister took Paul away from him and made his confirmation name Joseph.
I never paid much attention to St. Anthony until I found out he really, really can find things that are lost. But I have read his magazine for eons.
Tom - in my case, my dad was kind of a walking, talking Catechism lesson when I was growing up. Apparently he retained quite a bit of the Baltimore Catechism into adulthood. I remember, back when Trivial Pursuit was popular during the 1980s, there was a Catholic version which came out. All the questions were what I think of as "old school" Catholicism, e.g. how many choirs of angels are there? My dad killed it in that game; I don't think he ever lost.
DeleteHahaha! Paul was his favorite Beatle. "Anastasia" was popular among my Catholic girlfriends around 1964-5, I think because they thought it was pretty. "Bernadette" was also popular because of the movie.
DeleteJim, I was fourth grade, too. I was worried about getting slapped but more worried about having to answer a question (Sister had said we might be asked one of the catechism questions). That didn't happen. And the "slap" was just a tap on the cheek; Bishop Paschang was a kindly old soul. The thing I remember most is the scent of the chrism on my forehead. It was sweet, like Russian olive blossoms.
ReplyDeleteOur new church had just been built, and the bishop was out for the dedication. He did Confirmation the same weekend. I was curious as to what was in the "time capsule" that was put in place when they sealed the cornerstone, I never did find out. My mom was confirmed at the same time, since she was a convert. At that time they didn't do the whole works on Holy Saturday like they do now. It was funny, Mom's sponsor was a family friend who had been Dad's godmother. She wasn't even 5 ft tall, and Mom was 5'11" . We were joking that "Auntie Leora" needed a step-ladder to place her hand on Mom's shoulder.
About the Confirmation saints, several girls here picked Cecilia too. I think they just liked the name, which is having a moment. I have a great-niece and a cousin's daughter in the family who are named Cecilia. Also it is our cathedral namesake and archdiocesan patron, which might have influenced some of the kids.
St. Sebastian is also considered a patron of LBGTQ. Not sure why that is.
I am in favor of kids choosing their own Confirmation names. It seems unfair for parents and teachers to choose for them, since none of us gets to choose our actual names.
DeleteMy Confirmation name is Caroline. I regret to say that the saint, Charles Borromeo, had nothing to do with my choice. John Kennedy was in the White House, and his daughter Caroline was about my age. I thought that was cool. It is also the name of one of my aunts whom I was close to. Now I would probably choose something different, that maybe actually did have something to do with a saint I admired. Though I still think Caroline is a pretty name. I appreciate that my parents and teacher let me decide for myself.
More stuff converts don't get to do that you cradle Catholics have fond memories of.
ReplyDeleteThe Church Ladies did not let us have confirmation saints in RCIA. They added saints with our actual names to the litany of saints during the Easter vigil. Mine was some French nun I'd never heard of.
The teenagers in the parish never had them, either. They never talked about the saints when The Boy was in confirmation.
As usual, it was all stonewalled with a "we don't do that anymore."
I'm still pissed about it.
When my husband joined the church, they were still in the "we don't do that anymore" mode. It's funny, now they are back to doing it. Anyway he unofficially chose St. Francis, who is his favorite saint.
DeleteI never heard of people assigning a Confirmation saint to adult converts. Sounds like your church ladies are rather controlling. I'm assuming by this time you chose your own patron or patrons.
Jean - that they wouldn't let you, of all people, chose a saint, is monumentally unjust!
DeleteI wonder if, for you, the Ladies chose Jeanne Jugan? She's a good one: she founded the Little Sisters of the Poor. I know their order's name is extremely politicized these days (and may give you yet another reason to be pissed, considering the reason for that!), but they do wonderful work. Around here, they run a nursing home for people who otherwise wouldn't be able to afford the standard of care they provide. When our kids were little, we took our young-adult choir to sing at the home a couple of times; the residents listened patiently to the Christmas carols, but what they really wanted to do was hold our babies.
"Rather controlling" is an understatement. I'm sure they are doing more of God's work than me, but that's partly because they block everyone else from participating.
DeleteThe Confirmation class adopted our elderly neighbor. They raked his yard and kept his walk shoveled. He had them come in for Kool-Aid and to see his model cars. It was a nice project, but the Church Ladies insisted they find a Catholic family to help. Poor Neighbor Bob really looked forward to them, so Raber and I picked up the slack.
Without saints, why not be Protestant?
St. Hilda was my "patron saint" from before I was Catholic. I am also fond of Guthlac and his crows and Cuthbert who held a dying baby for a tired mother all night. (Good news: The baby lived!)
Holding babies is a pleasure I miss during the pandemic. Neighbor across the street has a granddaughter. She waves at me from the porch. I knitted her an octopus!
Speaking of "French nuns one never heard of", one of the girls here chose Amandine. She was a martyr in China during the Boxer Rebellion. Very admirable woman, but I'm pretty sure the girl liked the name. Which is okay too.
DeleteIt was St. Jeanne de Chantal added to the litany for me. I have tried to warm to her, as she had some beguine-like impulses. Sadly, at that time women running around I openly advocating for the poor and sick were a scandal, and her convent was cloistered up.
DeleteHer mentor was St. Francis de Sales. Initially he supported her desire for her sisters to not be cloistered, but in the end caved to peer pressure. Can't have these women gallivanting around (I don't know what they thought the women might do!)
DeleteI like Francis de Sales writing, and he sounded like a kind person. But I wish he had been able to persevere about non-cloistered nuns.
In the end a lot of French nuns got un-cloistered when they fled the reign of terror and came to America. Where the bishops were quite willing to use their labor, but didn't give them any more respect than they had in the old country.
In the case of the beguines, the women were called out at night to tend the sick and hold bedside vigils for the dead. They were often given the death service fees that the parish priests got, so the parish priests sometimes claimed that their night roaming really was prostitution. Everyone knew this was bunk, but the bishops got headaches trying to ameliorate the situation, often by requiring the beguines to wear nun-like habits and to live in enclosed residences. Something similar seems to have happened to St. Jeanne. Don't get me started ...
DeleteYes the history the relationship of women religious to bishops and male religious is certainly not edifying. The bishops generally wanted little to do with women religious; thought they should be the responsibility of male religious who in turn wanted little to do with the women and thought they should be the responsibility of bishops. Of course all this changed if they women were given money, then both the bishops and male religious wanted control of the money, and astute women leaders spent their time playing off bishops, male religious leaders, and secular benefactors against each other.
DeleteWhen the women religious were asked after Vatican II to renew themselves according to the charisms of their founders, they unearthed horror story after horror story of how bishops and priests had bent and twisted the original intentions of their founders.
When JP2 was in the mood of being apologetic for the Church’s past mistakes around the time of the millennium I thought he should have declaree a century of reparation for sins against women religious.
I am one of 5. Our parents chose names they liked. None of us are named for anyone else in the family tree, nor for saints.
ReplyDeleteI was confirmed in 8th grade. By then I was in a public school. I remember little about it. I lived in a small town, with relatively few Catholics. Maybe 1/2 dozen or so in the confirmation class? I don't remember. I also don't remember the ceremony, who performed it (I suppose it was a bishop, but...), nor who my confirmation sponsors were. I do remember my confirmation name.
My mother chose my confirmation name - Thérèse, for St. Thérèse of Lisieux. When I was ten I had a cardiac arrest during a routine appendectomy. It was in a small Catholic hospital (about 25 beds) that had a chapel - dedicated to Thérèse. When they finally told my mother (a couple of hours after the surgery was supposed to be finished) there had been "complications" she went to the chapel and prayed to St. Thérèse. It was her feast day also. Although the brain was without oxygen for a while, I recovered fully, with no brain damage. My mother attributes that more to Thérèse than to the doctor (a GP) who decided to cut open my chest and manually massage the heart. A very unconventional approach, but the hospital did not have the paddles you see on all the TV shows - chest compression was the norm then without paddles. He had seen it done once while assisting a surgeon on a battlefield in WWII, but, of course, had never done it himself. Perhaps Thérèse inspired him to try it. I have never smelled roses. Nor did I have "near death" experiences while near death. No floating above the operating table, no meeting Jesus or anyone else. Oh well.
We named our kids for themselves - names we liked. In my husband's family it gets confusing as everyone is named for someone else - so we have my husband's sister, Katherine, his aunt Katherine, his cousin Katherine etc, etc, etc. My husband was named for his two grandfathers.
Our kids have their own names - I'm not really big on ancestor worship. Maybe that's because I'm descended from poor Irish and German peasants, and my husband is descended from Massachusetts Bay Colony settlers (one of his names goes back to then - passed on through however many generations now)
Anne, wow, that is quite a story. It does sound miraculous. I'm glad that you made it. I'll bet it was a rough recovery period, with an appendectomy incision, and an open heart one. That would be dicey in the best of circumstances.
DeleteKatherine, the recovery was fast, actually. Apparently it took a day or two to clear my head of the anesthesia. I remember waking up and wondering why my chest hurt so much when it had been my abdomen that hurt when I got there. The doc was there, my mom, a nurse or two. We had moved to the community a couple of months earlier, and, of course, I had changed schools. He started asking questions - my name, my birthday, my siblings' names, etc. When he asked the name of my teacher he was satisfied because I gave him the name of my new teacher in my new school. I had no idea why I was being cross-examined that way. He then explained what had happened and why my chest was so sore. He had shoved the ribs apart to reach the heart after the CPR didn't work. Later that day they got me up to walk, which I thought was torturing me. But I was young and strong, and I was back in school 10 days after the surgery!
DeleteThe parish I belonged to for 30 years after getting married (the parish where we were married), has two large statues - one is St. Anthony and the other is St. Thérèse. I have never known what to think about this childhood incident. I sometimes would stop and talk to the statue - or who it represents, asking if she intervened. The doctor took a risk - the CPR didn't work so he tried something that could have resulted in disaster (brain damage or death). It worked though. It has actually been a humbling thought for me all my life. When one escapes near death, as I did, it makes you think about the why? Why did I live? Was there a reason? I don't know. I think it was just chance. I am an ordinary person who has lived an ordinary life. I was not miraculously saved so that I could accomplish something monumental for the good of humanity. I knew someone who missed a plane because of traffic and the plane crashed. He definitely did the same kind of soul-searching. I know that a lot of people who survive different things have survivor's guilt. I haven't experienced that, really, but I have sometimes felt guilt that I haven't done something more to save humanity!
I would talk to St. Anthony too in that church. St. Anthony is the reason I still believe in God (sort of). Because, as Tom notes, he is truly amazing at finding lost things! It makes me thing that maybe, just maybe, there is something beyond this mortal life.
Sounds like St. Therese chose you long ago! Do you feel any affinity with her?
DeleteI used to go to the "Catholic store" with my girlfriends as a kid. They would always pick out St. Jude medals (patron saint of hopeless cases) for me as a joke.
I still have a rather nice pewter one that I got when I was about 12. I think I would have been happy with him as a patron saint, too.
Anne, I'm remembering that you have three kids. They wouldn't be here if you hadn't survived that surgery. Nor the grandchildren, or descendants yet to come after your lifetime.
DeleteSt. Jude has never come through for me. St. Anthony has though, many times. I guess lost things are not "hopeless" cases!
DeleteThe coincidences with St. Therese have always intrigued me. I tend to NOT believe that anyone - saints or God - interferes with the normal course of human events. I don't believe that trump was chosen by God (as most evangelicals do) anymore than I think that Biden was.
But, the coincidence that I was operated on in a hospital that had a chapel, that the chapel was dedicated to St. Therese, and that the surgery took place on her feast day does intrigue me a bit. All the Brit detectives have a motto that "there are no coincidences". But maybe that's only when their hunting down the murderer.
However, I really have never felt any special affinity for Therese. Her whole life story is pretty unappealing to me. I guess because I'm not pious or saintly - don't relate.
Katherine, we do have three wonderful sons. However, none of them are on the road to saving humanity either. Maybe one of the grandkids?
I'm curious about the names chosen. I have literally never met anyone named Sebastian. Nor have I ever met a Cecilia. Is this generational? Or maybe regional?
ReplyDeleteI think the little Cecilias now are riding the Victorian name wave. I don't know anyone older than ten with that name. And who knew Emma would have such popularity, that is one of my granddaughters.
DeleteI don't know anyone outside of an Evelyn Waugh novel actually named Sebastian, just the ones who chose it for Confirmation.
I know one of each.
DeleteSebastian (Seb) Helfer (originaly Haelfer) described for us what the Marquette Interchange in Milwaukee was going to look like when it was nothing but several stories of air over small factories He redesigned the Marquette University campus accordingly, and what he described turned out to be what happened.
Cecilia (Cec) Crouse designed the Palm Beach County Sheriff's forensic (CSI) lab when hardly anyone but the FBI had one, and she is an internationally recognized authority on how to build and run one. When she retired from the sheriff's office, she threw a party for herself and asked that the only gifts be checks made out to the school in Haiti that our parish supports. Her husband, Bill, died last month, and someday I'll tell you my donut story about him. Before he died, he arranged for a bouquet of Hawaiian flowers to be sent to us in thanks for "all the advice Tom gave me, especially when I didn't listen to him." He had lined up post mortem gifts for lots of people. Because that is the kind of people the Crouses are.
Sound like amazing people.
DeleteDidn't Tom have a post up after this one, or did I just dream that?
ReplyDeleteHe did. About the rush to execute people
DeleteMaybe he went to update it and it reverted to "draft" status.
DeleteNo, I went to see what Katherine was cussing about, and when I came back it was gone. I must have deleted it going or coming.
DeleteThis is what she was cussing about, and I did, too: https://www.latimes.com/opinion/story/2020-11-23/joe-biden-conference-of-catholic-bishops-jose-gomez-abortion-rights-holy-communion
Sorry Tom. I didn't mean to make you lose your post!
DeleteHere's another thing to make me cuss, courtesy of the Homeless Commenters of NCR. I have to ask the question, do these guys work hard at being idiots, or does it just come naturally?
I chose Philip. Can't go wrong with one of the twelve apostles. Also, I was christened with no middle name. I adopted my confirmation name as my middle name. It was good since there are around ten guys named Stanley Kopacz in the US but now my name is unique. Kopacz (means "digging")is neither a common nor rare name in Poland and similarly among the immigrant Polish population here. Stanley is also a popular name among Polish-Americans because it sounds like Stanislaw (can't spell it right with this keyboard). Pronounced Stine-yees-waf. That's how I was baptized.
ReplyDeleteThere are a few Stanislaws or Stanislaus around here too. In fact we have a painting of Sy. Stanislaus, bishop and martyr, in our church. Some Stanley's also.
DeletePhilip is a good name too. I never can keep Philip the apostle and Philip the deacon straight as to who did what in Acts, but both were stalwart evangelizers.
"Sy" should be St.
DeleteAbout you not being christened with a middle name, I was christened with only my middle name, on account of my first name not being a saint's name. My birth certificate only has my first name. Made for some confusion when we got married and I needed to produce a Baptism certificate.
DeleteWow. Some of the names I hear at baptisms these days aren't even the names of previous humans.
DeleteRe: common names and saints' names: I also noticed last Saturday that about half the boys who were being confirmed that day were named Conor or some spelling variant thereof. It turns out that there is a St. Conor, although his sainthood seems to be of fairly recent vintage. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Concobhar_%C3%93_Duibheannaigh
DeleteNot sure why Conor is such a popular name, or was some 15-16 years ago. These things definitely go in fads.
Yeah, I think the Kyle-and-Kayla phase is over.
Delete