"First, Do No Harm"

I don't know if any of you have come across this tragic story about a young woman, Alana Chen, who died in an apparent suicide. She had previously shared her story in August in a Denver Post article about undergoing "conversion therapy" . From that article:

"Chen came out to a priest at Boulder’s St. Thomas Aquinas Catholic Church when she was in high school around 2009. The priest began counseling Chen informally throughout her high school years, telling her not to tell her parents, she said."
"...Chen continued attending the church after enrolling at the University of Colorado Boulder in 2013 and sought more formal counseling through her church and Catholic Charities’ Sacred Heart Counseling, formerly known as Regina Caeli Clinical Services. Chen said she was trying to reconcile her sexual identity with her dream of becoming a nun.
“I felt a lot of shame and anxiety,” Chen said. “I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Was I going to hell? But I was still extremely faithful, and I felt like the church and the counseling was the thing that was saving me. The worse I got, the more I clung to it.”
"...Chen wound up in a psychiatric hospital in 2016 after her family found scars on her arms from self-harming. She distanced herself from the church, stopped attending CU Boulder and started long-term mental health treatment."
Chen said, “I was feeling so much shame that I was comforted by the thought of hurting myself. I’ve now basically completely lost my faith. I don’t know what I believe about God, but I think if there is a God, he doesn’t need me talking to him anymore.”

This is from a statement made on a public Facebook page by Alana Chen's mother, after her death:
"This is Father David Nix's blog (www.padreperegrino.org), the first priest who destroyed my daughter, Alana’s life. He is very responsible for her depression and ultimately her suicide. Alana trusted him and came out to him when she was 14. He responded by telling her to never tell her family, because we would accept her and love her unconditionally. He was manipulating and brainwashing Alana from ages 14-21. Nix's beliefs are not of God and Jesus. He told her it was a mortal sin to be attracted to woman and would refer to it as SSA (same sex attraction). In the blog below, Denver's Bishop Samuel J. Aquila (extremely conservative) approves Father David Nix becoming a "hermit priest", whatever that means. The Bishop had to relocate Father Nix to several different Churches in Colorado and other states because he was outrageous and causing harm to each one. For years, I've reached out to the Bishop to have Alana protected from Nix and to help my daughter from the religious abuse. The Bishop personally never returned my calls or emails.
Father Peter Mussett, the Pastor of St. Thomas Aquinas mentored Alana in the same harmful way after Nix left. Mussett presents himself as very loving and inclusive in his homilies and appearance, and many CU Boulder students are attracted to this Church because of that. But Mussett also taught Alana that LGBTQ were not allowed to receive communion if they were in relationships. My daughter had to go to confession with male priests weekly if she wanted to receive communion at mass. Mussett never responded to my emails.
While Alana was attending CU, the Bishop sent a group of nuns called the Sisters of Life to administer mentoring and Spiritual Direction to churches nearby college campuses, clearly targeting the youth. They talked her into conversion therapy, asked for my permission, and I absolutely refused.
After years of this type of emotional and religious abuse, Alana progressively became depressed, distraught, and suicidal. During these periods, while in hospitals and rehab, I reached out to all members of the church to not contact Alana. Did they listen? No. They would call Alana and show up at the treatment center. "

Here are a few of my thoughts on this tragedy:  The first is that when my husband was in deacon formation, they were told that they should absolutely never attempt psychotherapy unless they were trained and had qualifications for that, and it was their profession. If someone came to them and needed that kind of help, they were to refer them to a qualified professional. I assumed that priests were also given that kind of a caveat.  But perhaps not.
However, this young woman was referred to Catholic Charities, which normally would have people who were qualified psychotherapists.  And I realize that Catholic Charities vary a lot according to location. But in this instance they attempted conversion therapy, which has been widely discredited, and which is illegal on minors in Colorado.  However Alana Chen was not a minor at this time and was not protected under this law.
There are a number of red flags here.  The first was when Alana was a teenager and sought counseling from Father Nix, and he told her not to tell her family. That was all kinds of sketchy. Another flag was when her mother complained to the archdiocese, she got no response.  And later found out that Father Nix had been relocated to several churches because of problems. And yet another flag was when Alana's mother asked the nuns and church people not to contact Alana during her time in hospital and rehab, and they did not respect that request.
The lessons to be learned by the church from this tragedy are negative ones, what not to do in their efforts to accompany LGBQT people.  They should start by reading Fr. James Martin's book, "Building a Bridge: How the Catholic Church and the LGBT Community Can Enter into a Relationship of Respect, Compassion, and Sensitivity".